The heat was hot and the ground was dry


My DoorDash endeavor, initiated to bring in some extra money so we don’t drain all of our retirement money before we actually move, has led me to adopt a particular philosophy. That philosophy is one that, I think, will serve me well when we are in other countries, whether snowbirding, exploring or relocating.

We all know that it’s important to stay hydrated. So many health issues can be alleviated by drinking enough water every day. When I’m in my office at home, it’s easy enough to do that. I have a mug warmer on my desk beside my computer for a cup of coffee or tea.

It used to be said that coffee and tea don’t count, since caffeine is a diuretic. It was thought that it dehydrated you, but the point is to push water through your system, including your kidneys, so it’s now understood that coffee and tea do count in the daily tally.

Something I’ve noticed is that, due to that diuretic effect, coffee goes through me faster, and in greater quantity, than just water alone. I think there’s some weird physics at work here, because I could drink just one cup of coffee and have to pee two or three times in an hour’s time. But still, it counts, so I’m cool with it.

After I’ve finished with my morning libation, I replace the cup of coffee or tea with a glass of water (minus the warming). I’ve gotten into the habit of taking a drink every few minutes, and refilling the glass when I empty it, so I’m staying hydrated.

Later in the day, the water may be replaced by a glass of Jameson Irish Whiskey, or sometimes a bourbon, or maybe a Bird Dog Maple Whiskey. Unfortunately, that doesn’t count toward my water intake, but the beer I have with my dinner does. (It’s mostly water.) So I’m fairly happy with my hydration level each day. (However, alcohol tends to make me go a lot more, too. Don’t ask me why.)

When I’m out doing DoorDash deliveries in the morning, though, I’m not, obviously, sitting at my desk. So I take a large container of water with me. Sometimes, if I’m picking up an order from Lamar’s Donuts, I might order a donut and a cup of coffee for myself, or a cup of coffee and a flaky cinnamon roll from Duffeyroll (OH MY GOD!). Also, Linda tends to receive a lot of Starbuck’s gift cards as Christmas gifts, and she’s sweet enough to share them with me. So with that and the water, I know I’m staying hydrated while dashing.


But, as noted above, the coffee rushes through me. This has inspired the philosophy I referred to at the beginning of this post chapter. During peak hours, once I’ve completed one delivery, I will immediately get another one. I’m amazed at what people will pay to have something delivered. A few days ago, I was paid $13 to deliver two cups of coffee from Lamar’s Donuts. No donuts, just coffee. A couple of days later, I got $45 to shop for twenty-three items from Safeway and deliver them to someone’s door.

Anyway, that means that there’s little to no “me time” when I’m out there. When spending hours at a time in my car, elimination opportunities are limited. Some fast food places, with the prevalence of COVID, have locked up their dining rooms and are only peddling their vittles through the drive-thru window. Therefore, my new philosophy has become something of a lifesaver. It’s something that I do pretty much every time I actually go into a McDonald’s or a Chick-fil-A or an Einstein Bagel. Before picking up the order, I head for the restroom.

So, as I’m driving a hundred miles around town every morning, it occurred to me that, when we’re in new environs, exploring unfamiliar territory, seeing the sights, we may find that public restrooms are few and far between. When we’re sampling the local libations, that may mean we have to go more often. So, in order to not have our explorations inhibited, my new philosophy is this:

Whenever you are presented with an opportunity to pee, do it.

You’ll thank me later.